Pigfarts [continued from 1.0]

*grumbles* I suppossssssse it's worth it XD

"More, hmm? I dunno if that's possible," he replied. It still surprised him how deeply he had fallen for her. If anything though, everything that had recently happened in the past couple months had grown and intensified dramatically. "Oh...wait. This is the part where I go 'I love you the mostest', isn't it," he said with a grin, nudging her nose slightly with his. "Well, mostest isn't even a word, but it's true. You're mine and nothing's ever going to change that." It would be cruel for something to come between them now and he hoped that everything from here on out would be relatively smooth sailing. Though, Bert was still a jerk and a tool and Scorpius did not trust that guy to stay away from Pansy. Each day he was reminded of Bert's presence, the looks that the fellow student gave Pansy leaving Scorpius extremely uneasy. After all, Pansy was a freaking MILF. It was no wonder that Bert wanted her.

Bert is wandering the halls, pressing his ear against every door, trying to see if he can hear HER voice coming from one of the doors. He has a pair of her socks with him and he keeps smelling them, he found them in the common room one day and kept them for himself, he smells them regularly.

[Major creepy right thur. JS.]

My heart dropped Milli. It dropped and stopped and aksfjhgksjds;kjvz;xkclv;lkxcv;lkdszval;kfja;lkjfas.

Breathe sis. Just. Breathe.

BERT.JAHKSDFK;D THIS IS BERT
RIGHT THERE.
THIS IS PANSY AND MY BABY
AJKDS;FALKFAJ
ADLSASDKF;OEIJWGHIR0[DKNOSVJKR[GFIJOSDKC;FGJKAB
BERTTTTTASDM,FHASDKLFJ

LAKJGWR.
PANSY IS BUSY FREAKING THE HECK OUT.
SHE CAN'T EVEN FORMULATE A RESPONSE RIGHT NOW BECAUSE IT'S LIKE, WHATAHWEHG BERT? NO. NO NO NO CREEPER GO AWAY. GO LEAVE ME AND MY BABY AND MY BABYDADDY ALONE.
SHE WILL REPLY ONCE SHE CAN STOP FREAKING OUT. IDK WHEN THAT WILL BE.
Because for some reason I'm really sleepy and she's really jumpy.

I AM STILL FREAKING OUT.
I CANNOT ASDKLFJADLS;ZKJJKCNVKFJSNGROWANJDVKGEQP
sjvdk'nfjckvlmnbcklv; fgn;orHISLKdslk fna'klsd mf'dslaf
asdf
jdnkfdms ;v
That's how my mind is when I think about Bert.
oh goodness.

*wonders why you guys picked the name bert*

*thrusts*

Yeah well it also means this.
NO THANK YOU BERT.
GO AWAY BERT.
NO ONE LIKES YOU BERT.

*dry humps you next time I am watching you as you are sleeping*

LKAJDSFLKAWERBGJDFS
SCORP.
SCORP. *CLINGS*
MAKE HIM STOP OGMOGMGOMGOMG OMG

OMG
KALDS;FJ;LAKSFJDADSJKFLKCJXN
NO
NO YOU HAVE NOT
OMG
SCORP IS NEVER SLEEPING AGAIN.
EVER.
HE WILL WATCH YOU CONSTANTLY BERT
AFKL;SDJF;LKASDJF;ALKDJFAJ[I0EOQFKMSS'IFEHDSVIJPDE[]=FPQWKASOVDN'O'P
MEDA

Bert wrote:*dry humps you next time I am watching you as you are sleeping*

*winks*
Hey, I hear you like creeping on people too.
*takes a creeper pic of Bert because he's hot*

*watches scorp and pansy shower*
*watches scorp and pansy get it on from behind the couch*
*creeps with Justina, letting her take the pictures*

WHAT A CUTE FIRST DATE

..... Scorp we can't get it on in open rooms anymore.
Or shower. *blinks*
*clings and never never lets go ever*

*holds onto Pansy*
OKAY. We've got to find a new bathroom. I mean, there's got to be another one somewhere. Then...well..there are plenty of other places to shag. I mean...it's you after all that's been the one who can't seem to keep your pants on.

Yeah yeah yeah.
I vote for moving back to the guest quarters. They're locked off and have private bathrooms and several rooms within rooms and couches and rugs and beds and dressers and nice things.
*still clings*

I...LIKE THIS PLAN. CAN WE TALK TO RUMBLEROAR AFTER WE'RE DONE PLAYING?
BERT IS JUST SO...CREEPY.

YES.
ABSOLUTELY.
THERE ARE SOME SPECIAL CIRCUMSTANCES GOING ON HERE.
I THINK HE WILL ALLOW IT.

I WHOLE-HEARTEDLY AGREE.
TO THE GUEST ROOMS.
I mean, it's just temporary. Once we graduate we'll have a place of our own.
OMG.
THAT...OMG. DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW TO CLEAN OR COOK?
HAH.
TWO KIDS...FROM PUREBLOOD FAMILIES....HAVING TO DEAL WITH A HOME AND A BABY.

.............. UMMMMM.
UMMMMMMMMMMMM.
Can we get a house elf?

ON MARS?!
I DON'T THINK HOUSE ELVES ARE QUITE THE SAME HERE. SOMETHING TELLS ME THEY ARE A DIFFERENT SPECIES ENTIRELY.