Boy's Dormitory 1 (Sev, Draco, Angel, Blaise) [NC-17]

Severus stared at him, the tears back in his eyes. He wasn't sure how much more he could take tonight. "I was drunk too, you idiot. You think I'd ever do something in my right mind to hurt Pansy, when she's about the only friend I've got? You're a right fool if you believe anything you just said," he said quietly, looking mournfully at poor Kerbit. He could hardly believe how calm he was being, when not ten minutes ago he'd been ready to throttle the first person who presented themselves. He supposed he was just too damn depressed for anything to matter anymore. "And I'm nothing like Granger, you stupid shithead. See, I actually care about people. I care about Pansy, and I feel like shit about it, in case you didn't notice. And I care about you. Why the hell else would I have sat there listening to you in the first place? Don't you dare blame this on me, Draco. We were both drunk out of our minds, and we both made a horrible mistake, one you obviously regret as much as I do. Don't try and pin this all on me, I didn't force you to do shit. You came on to me, in case you forgot!" he snapped, burying his face in his hands. "I'm fucking sorry, alright? But there's nothing I can do. I can't take it back, even if I want to."

"Yeah, I did somewhat forget I since even when I asked you about it down in the common room and you knew about all of it, you didn't even bother to tell me then! You got up and left!" Draco turned and faced the wall, resting his arm on it to hold his balance, "How does everyone know about this? I couldn't have said anything because I didn't fucking know about it til 10 minutes ago..." He felt himself calm down, the anger dissipating, "Don't you dare fucking talk about Pansy. Just don't. You don't get me, you don't understand how I fucking feel right now," The anger was being replaced with shame. He had let all of this happen after he promised... after he said he wouldn't... after he told Pansy he loved her and recognized he was stupid. He asked her not to give up on him, when now he was even giving up on himself, "You don't - you don't understand. You, you only fucked up once and she probably would forgive you with more ease than she'd forgive me, if she even did at all. I can't do this anymore. I can't fucking deal with this. I'm done with being the fucking shitty person I am. You're lucky, Sev, you still have her as a friend, but if she finds out about this - about how I've managed to fuck her over again - I'm screwed....I'm so fucking screwed," He couldn't take it anymore. He had to leave. He turned and left from the dormitory and he, most certainly, would not be returning.

[Where are you going? Because I am hunting you down.]

[The Astronomy Tower. To kill myself, duh.]

Draco Malfoy wrote:[The Astronomy Tower. To kill myself, duh.]

[LIKE HELL YOU ARE. ]

[POST BECAUSE I AM COMING AFTER YOU.]

Severus ran after him.

Severus quietly shut the door behind him, once again grateful to find the dormitory empty. He stripped off his soaked clothing and pulled on some warm, dry sweatpants and a t-shirt, and climbed into bed. He was happy for Draco and Pansy, he really was. It meant there was hope. That there was love. That there was something out there, that might possibly be worth living for. He sighed and snuggled up in the blankets, wishing he had someone beside him. No, he didn't want Remus there- he didn't want anything to do with him anymore. He was sick of the pain that he always brought with him, sick of his empty words, sick of his lies. He just wanted someone to hold, someone to hug and kiss, someone to call his own. Was it so much to ask for in this life? A companion? Someone he could learn to love, for someone to love him? Perhaps it was. His thoughts flickered to Lily again, and the image of her lips against James' angered him. It wasn't right, it wasn't just- he didn't deserve her! He didn't deserve someone so beautiful, so pure, so perfect. And yet she gave herself to him willingly, it seemed. He pushed the thoughts away, not ready to deal with that tonight. And then he thought of Adrian. The girl was so beyond hope, so beyond the point of recovery. She was a sick, twisted woman; her soul was broken. What did a girl like her feel? What were her heart's desires? Did she too, want to be loved? Or was pain all that she even wanted anymore, pain and pleasure? Was she even capable of loving? Severus sighed, wishing he could wrap his head around that girl. There was something different in her, something wrong, but whatever it was he found impossibly intriguing. Was he doomed to turn out like she had? So lost, so far away from all that he had ever wanted, so... wasted. Would he some day end up like Adrian, or was there still hope? Was there still the possibility that he too, might find someone to cherish, someone to be call his own, his own to love, to worship, to care for? He didn't know, he just didn't know, but it didn't matter right now. Right now, all that mattered was that things were working themselves out, for better or for worse, whether he liked it or not. He slowly drifted off to sleep, that awful question still ringing in his mind. Will I ever be good enough for someone else?

[goodnight guys]

[When Sev and Adrian have another somewhat civil conversation, she can answer his questions vaugely without him asking her... I've pretty much figured out what her stance on love is, but I'm still working out the kinks. Pun not intended! hehehe]

[Sounds good. Sex or talk first next time we're both on?]

[Sex

Sev... we need to talk... Tam knows (vaguely) how Mya found out...]

[Alright. I was about to go shower... I'll be back in ten minutes.]

[that's fine! just post when you're back... I have computer class now so I'll be here... then I have lunch so I'll be here then too... so I'm on until 12:05 ish]

Severus awoke, and left the dormitory for the showers. He felt like shit, and thought he might have a fever, likely from staying out for hours in the rain last night.

[Dude... are we meeting in the showers again?]

[Yes.]

[Fine... I'll get her out of the HW then]

Sev bursts into the dormitory yelling "KERBITTTTTTTTTTTTTT!" and quickly retrieves him from the floor where he'd been forgotten in yesterday's drama. He places him on Draco's pillow, puts a band aid on his head where he got cracked, and runs out of the dormitory again yelling "HE'S OKAYYYY!"

[Definitely missed something. I just died laughing!]

Severus led Narcissa into the room, gently pushing her onto the bed and climbing on top of her, casting away his unbuttoned shirt and beginning to work on hers. He leaned forward and muttered in her ear, "You're sure you want this?"

[Post once more and than I'll take over if you want.]

[Alright!]

Narcissa's breathing hitched and she thought for a moment. "Yes," she breathed. "I do."

'Even if he doesn't seriously like me,' she thought, 'At least he cares about me at least a little.'

That was all Severus needed as he continued to remove her shirt, his eyes widening at the delectable woman that he’d exposed, tossing the shirt to the side. “You’re beautiful,” he murmured, kissing her deeply on the lips and brushing a stray strand of her silvery blonde hair out of her eyes. “Scratch that. You’re absolutely scrumptious,” he whispered, trailing his lips along her neck. He let his hands wander, cupping her breast with his left, and slipping the right hand up her skirt, fingering the lace of her panties. The girl gasped a little, a bit of fear flickering in her eyes, but it quickly dissipated as Severus slid her panties down, casting them aside to join their shirts in the pile on the ground. A single finger slowly parted her lips and slid inside her, drawing a soft moan from her small mouth as her eyes gazed into his. For a moment, Severus was very aware of just how innocent she was, but as a second finger joined the first she let out a deep sigh, and all logical thought erased itself from his mind. She wanted this. She asked for this. He wouldn’t feel a damn bit guilty for it.

Narcissa’s eyes widened as the man began to undo the button of his own jeans, and before she knew it, they too had fallen upon the pile of clothes on the side of the bed. All that lay between their bodies was her bra and his boxers, the former of which he unhooked and flung somewhere behind him, not particularly noticing where it had landed. He slowly slid down, burying his face in her bosom and licking between her breasts, a tiny breath escaping her lips as she felt his erection through the fabric of his boxers. It wasn’t long before they’d disappeared as well, and it was just the two of them, man and woman, flesh on flesh. Narcissa let out a small squeak. “That’s supposed to fit?!” she exclaimed, looking terrified for a brief moment and drawing laughter from Severus. “Yes, Narcissa. It fits, I assure you,” he replied with a smirk, slowly spreading her legs apart with the palms of his hands, his touch igniting a sudden irrevocable desire within her. “Speak now, or forever hold your peace,” he joked drunkenly, his throbbing cock aching with need. “I want… I want you,” she finally replied, if a bit hesitantly at first. Severus grinned at her words, kissing her on the mouth again and giving her full breasts a slight squeeze before he plunged into her, quite suddenly, drawing a sharp cry of pain from the girl beneath him. “Sev-Severus…” she whimpered, her eyes rolling back in her head as he thrust into her again, again, again. Before long, their bodies found a wonderful rhythm, and while Severus was far too drunk to really process what was happening, Narcissa most certainly wasn’t. Merlin, why did I do this, do this to him, to myself? she thought to herself, but the thoughts were wiped from her mind as she let out a long moan as he pushed himself even deeper than before, harder, faster, his hands gripping her body tightly as he fucked her, the sweat from his skin mingling with hers, his tongue exploring her mouth. He let out a groan as she clutched at his back, throwing back her head onto the bed, her blonde hair splayed out around her, framing her face. It wasn’t much longer before he felt himself reaching climax. Lifting her legs up by her thighs just the slightest, he plunged into her with full force, moaning her name as he spilled into her, unaware of the silent tears sliding down her pale cheeks.

Severus collapsed on top of her, kissing her gently on the lips and rolling off of her onto his side, wrapping his arms around her. “Amazing,” he whispered, before drifting off to sleep, exhausted from lack of sleep, too much firebeer, and vigorous lovemaking. Narcissa quietly brushed the tears away and let herself fall asleep beside him, still unsure of her decision.

Sunlight was finally creeping through the windows, and Severus awoke. He was surprised to find Narcissa still beside him, until last night events caught up with him. Well, damn. He thought about staying around until she awoke, but decided he didn't honestly care enough to bother. He carefully climbed out of the bed trying not to wake her, dressed and left the dormitory, leaving her behind.

[But I wanted to take a ride on Sev's unicorn horn! Noooo!]

Narcissa woke up, her vision foggy and blurred. She took in the unfamiliar surroundings and began to panic. 'Where am I?' she wondered. 'Is this... The Boys' Dormitory?' Suddenly, the events from the passed night flooded her. 'Oh fuck! I didn't--did I? SHIT!' she felt the tears gather in the corner of her eyes and bit down on her lip. 'How... How could I be so fucking stupid?!' she gathered her clothes up and began to dress. 'I hardly knew him, did I honestly think he'd be interested in me for my personality? It's my fault anyways; I shouldn't have agreed. I'm not going to get anywhere by laying down and letting everyone walk all over me. Fuck being nice, it's too much work!' And after angrily combing through her hair with her fingers, Cissy stormed out of the room, making sure to shut the door behind her.