Pigfarts [Somewhat Alternative Universe]

He decided to not comment on what it looked like, for it would be best to try and imagine it was the most delicious thing in the world. He took a piece of it, assumed it was vanilla because of the white colour. He popped a piece in his mouth, his face cringing slightly. It was..interesting, to say the least. "It's...it's okay," he said once he finished eating it. "Not quite my cup of tea, but it isn't all that bad. If anything, it makes me wish I had a bowl of real ice cream. Wait," he said frowning. "On Mars, they probably don't have ice cream! I don't even remember the last bowl of ice cream I had! " he said, fairly upset over this. "I...there's a whole bunch of things that I won't have for a long time. Why didn't I think of this before hand? Why didn't I raid the kitchens and have a goodbye feast?"

Pansy's eyes got big with that realization. "No ice cream on Mars..." She stared at her freeze dried ice cream, horrified. She couldn't eat this forever. But they had to have real food, right? They couldn't just eat freeze dried stuff all the time. That was ridiculous. Just because Mars was another planet, it didn't mean... no. But what if... oh nooo. "Scorp! What if they don't have real food at all! What if we have to eat this shit forever?" She took another bite, taking the time to taste it and try to figure out if it was any good at all. Nope. Absolutely no better the second time. And it was crunchy. Ice cream shouldn't be crunchy unless it was chocolate chips or something IN the ice cream. "I wish I had thought to get real food before I left too. But we were too busy tasting each other to worry about food."

"This...is rather depressing," he said, letting the bag of freeze dried ice cream drop to the ground. "I can't even look at this bag without thinking of real food. The better have good stuff on Pigfarts, or I don't think I can last there very long. I mean, it's one of my daily and essential activities: sleeping, shagging, and eating. Without good food, I'm going to be a mess," he said dramatically. "Well, looks like trying to distract myself with food isn't going to work. Have any other ideas on what we could do to pass the time? Any ways in which you feel like entertaining me?" he asked with a wink.

"Daily? You shag daily?" Pansy asked him skeptically, laughing because she didn't believe that was the truth. She propped her elbows on her knees and looked at him for a minute, appalled that he would ask her to entertain him. She got up and walked over to him, putting a hand on each arm of the seat and leaning down to look him in the face. "Entertain you? What makes you think I'm here for your entertainment?" She didn't move for a few seconds, but then stepped quickly around the back of his seat and headed for the cupboard again to do some more digging. There HAD to be something better to eat on this ship. Finally she came across a box of Bertie Botts every flavor jelly beans, and she opened them up to look inside. It was still pretty full. Feeling rather victorious about finding something at least mostly edible, she turned back to Scorp and talked to the back of his head. "You up for trying something crazy? It could be fun." She was talking about eating the jelly beans you people with your minds in the gutter.

"Used to be daily, before I had a girlfriend," he said with shrug. "Obviously things changed once I was in that relationship. Wouldn't necessarily mind going back to how that lifestyle was." His eyes widened slightly when she came close to him, before he raised an eyebrow. Before he could reply though, she had moved away from him. Dammit. Well, he supposed that the more distance between them, the safer they were. He placed his head back on the seat and closed his eyes for a moment, listening to her messing around in the closet. When she asked him the question, he was rather pleased that she had thought of something. "Alright," he replied. "I'm up for anything right now." Actually, that's a lie. He'd probably do anything but shag Illie. He wasn't bored enough for that.

She walked back over to him and took his hand, putting a small handful of beans in it, standing by his chair as she dug through the rest of the box trying to choose a somewhat safe-looking bean. She tried not to laugh as she realized that a handful of jelly beans probably wasn't what he was expecting from her, but come on, would it really be that easy for him to get with Pansy again? Obviously not. Part of the magicalness of Sansy is that Scorp tends to totally dominate it, which is against what Pansy generally deals with, so he'd have to be the one to suggest outer space crazy experimenting, not Pansy. She finally picked a pink bean and ate it, smiling victoriously. "Ha! Strawberry. Bet it's better than what you'll get."

1. I had my mind in the gutter.
and
2. Illie is gorgeous..

That is all....

aawwwww

[Right...err...sorry Nev.]

Scorpius glanced down at his hand which now held quite a few Bertie Bott's beans. So this...was what she had in mind? He wondered if this is how she had repaid his cousin when Draco would say he was bored. Though, he supposed that having been in a relationship with Draco, Pansy would have done much more than hand over some beans. Also, Scorp has temporarily learned his boundaries and won't go suggesting sex. After all, after a heated argument over their fail of getting to Pigfarts, it could probably be some intense stuff. He picked one up carefully after realizing all the colours were horrible in his hand, so he didn't quite have a choice. Popping it in his mouth, he promptly spits it out onto the ground. "Fucking hell...that was...that was rotten," he said, cringing from the taste. "Tasted like bad eggs. Figures you'd get a good flavour, you're just sitting there digging through the box. Here, why don't we play this way: we'll pick a flavour for each other and the other has to eat, no matter what."

[Now whenever I read your posts.....I imagine Bradley...and they are like soo alike its kind of freaky.]

Pansy laughed as he got a bad one, as she'd been hoping that would happen. It helped that she tried to pick the good ones out of the handful she'd given him, but that wasn't something she'd be mentioning to Scorpius. "Here, this one's better, I promise. Maybe it'll get rid of the taste." She barely managed to successfully hand him a small yellow one because of her laughter at her reaction, but she was positive this one she handed him was lemon-lime. smiled at him, accepting his little challenge. She took a seat again in the floor by his chair, leaning her back against the lower part of it, careful to avoid his half-chewed jelly bean he'd spit out. "Deal. We have to eat it and completely swallow it, and the first to chicken out or spit, loses. You pick for me first." She handed him the box over her head and leaned back to watch him, hoping he hadn't memorized what any of the particularly horrid flavors looked like.

He quickly took the bean that she offered, plopping it in his mouth as his mouth sighed in relief from the flavour. Thank Merlin it wasn't another nasty one. He then accepts her challenge, eager for this little game. Scorpius gladly took the box from her hand, then glanced inside of it. Gently shaking it, he tried to find a horrid flavour. Trouble was, he didn't know which colours would go with the flavours. He decided to just pick a dark coloured one, handing it over to her and watching her momentarily examine the petrol flavoured bean. "Not quite sure what that one is, but it doesn't look very pretty. He sat back, eager to see if she would fully eat the damn thing. He truly hoped she did, for he wasn't sure how long he was going to last in the little game. If he couldn't even finish Rotten Eggs, then who knew how many horrid flavours it would take.

Pansy held it between her fingers, looking at it for a moment. She wasn't sure what flavor this one was, it was hard to guess by just looking at it. She took a breath and popped it into her mouth, crunching down and groaning as she did. Despite the fact that she wanted nothing more than to get that out of her mouth right now, she chewed quickly and swallowed, grimacing. "That was horrible. I could even smell it. Like I'd just taken a gas pump and used it as a straw." She shuddered, taking the box from his hands. "Your turn..." She dug through a little while, trying to choose something that looked quite vile. Finally she found one that was bright bright red. She hoped it was acid or something else excruciatingly spicy hot, but wasn't really sure. She held it up to him, still wishing she could get the taste of petrol out of her mouth.

Scorpius couldn't help but laugh at her expression. "Well, it certainly seemed horrible from that face you made." He bravely took the bean from her hand, staring at it for a moment with uncertainty. Well. It couldn't be that bad. He quickly popped it into his mouth, his mouth puckering from the acidy taste and how truly, terribly horrible and vile it is. Still, he managed to swallow the damn thing. "That...was horrible. ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE. I will so get you back for that," he said, grabbing the box out of her hands and searching for the perfect bean. He had found another dark bean and quickly passed the ink flavoured thing to her.

Pansy laughed at his face, but quickly fell silent again as he handed her a black bean. Hm. Well this could either be licorice, or sardines, or maybe ink. She shrugged and tasted it, cringing as she did. Ink. "Blech. Ink." She chewed quickly and swallowed, her mouth feeling incredibly sticky and disgusting. "Did it turn my tongue black, I wonder? It probably did. Did it?" She turned and stuck her tongue out for Scorp to tell her if it was or not. She tried to stick it out further and glance down at it herself, but that didn't work, so she stopped before she looked like a total idiot. She still felt really sticky, as if she's smeared goopy ink all over the inside of her mouth. Why someone would do that, she wasn't sure, but that's what it felt like.

Scorpius felt confident that she wasn't going to finish it, when low and behold she does.
"Well damn," he said with a dramatic sigh. He glanced at her tongue, very impressed with how far out it can go and keeping his thoughts only semi-appropriate, then answered her. "It's...pretty black," he said with a nod."I'm sure that one was just completely fantastic," he said with a grin. "Kind of surprised you actually finished the thing.

Pansy closed her mouth again with a smug grin, glad she surprised him by actually finishing it. "It was bloody awful. Still is. You got anything to wipe my tongue off on? Or is that cheating and causing me to lose? Because I won't be losing if I can help it..." She took the box back from him and selected another one, a color she almost couldn't identify. Orangey yellowy lime green, she supposed you could call it, but even so, the more you looked at it, the less sure you were about the color of it. She gleefully handed it over, still wishing for something to clean out her mouth.

"Here, why don't you wipe it off with my tongue or wiener? Ohhhh, no no no," he said with a grin. "You need to sit there and endure the disgustingness." He took the offered jelly bean from her hand, and noticed that the colour made it seem like it wasn't that bad. He looked at it for a moment. Well, if she was giving it to him it was sure to be horribly gross. He popped it into his mouth and chewed it quickly. He gagged slightly at the taste, but managed to get the bean down. "Vomit..." he said shaking his head. "Disgusting...worst...vile...gah!" He sat for a moment, desperately wishing he had a drink. Realizing he would just have to endure the nastiness, he dug through the box, picked out a light blue one, grinned and said, "Here, wash down that ink one with this."

"Yep. Just need to sit there and endure the disgustingness." She laughed at him but was wary as he handed her another jelly bean. She paused, not sure what to expect. It was light blue. Not a very threatening color, but there was almost no blue food in the world, so this couldn't be good unless it was like, cotton candy or something. She couldn't be that lucky, could she? She put it cautiously in her mouth, not really tasting much at first, her mouth still coated with ink. But in an instant, it hit her. She felt like all the liquid from her stomach would reappear in her mouth, that feeling just before you throw up. She covered her mouth with her hand trying to eat it quickly. But... She couldn't. She gagged, winced, and the jelly bean was in her hand and she flung it across the ship. "Worst yet. No idea what it was. That one bit back. I guess... I guess I lost." She glanced up at him, frowning. She did not like to lose. 

He couldn't help but grin when he was finally triumphant. VICTORYYY! He couldn't blamer her though, all the flavours must have added up at once and hit her. Hell, he knew that there was no way he could even last another bean. "Well, after having petrol and ink, I'm guessing that last one was the cherry on top of the ice cream." He frowned for a moment, because he seriously will miss ice cream. "Well, I'm sorry that you lost Queen Pansy. Perhaps I can offer you a consolation prize?" he asked with a slight smirk.

Pansy took the box from him, closing it up and setting it aside because she was definitely done with that game now. No more or there would be real vomit to go with the jelly bean vomit. She pouted a moment at the mention of ice cream, but was soon distracted by his question. "A consolation prize?" She was skeptical, but curiosity won out. "What could you possibly offer me to make me feel better, huh?" she asked him, returning the smirk he had given her.

"What could I possibly offer you?" he questioned. "Well, I can think of many things. Some which will really make you feel better Those kinds of things though, will probably have you kick my arse for suggesting. So I suppose, that any sort of prize would have to be one which is not too over the top," he said, leaning forward slightly on his chair so that his face moved closer to where hers was. "The real problem is, is that I don't have much up here. Only have myself to offer you really," he said with a grin.

Pansy didn't move away as he leaned closer, but instead closed the gap just a little more. "Only yourself? Well that's unfortunate as that's completely uninteresting to me." She blinked slowly and stayed still. "Looks like you did learn a litle bit of a boundary though. However, I shouldn't speak too soon. You'll cross the line in no time, I'm sure. You always do when we're stuck in a small place together." Pansy leaned back a little. "I still expect a prize though. A prize for losing is way better than a punishment or something additionally undesirable as those jelly beans." Pansy nearly grimaced again at the thought, but kept her expression blank.

He raised an eyebrow when she said that he was completely uninteresting to her. Uninteresting? Perhaps she only said that when he didn't have her pinned against a wall of some sort. He tried to think of what he would have that could possibly interest her, when one thing came to mind. He was going to save it for when they had successfully landed, but supposed that now would be just fine. Pushing himself off of the seat, he somewhat floated over to the cupboard where he kept his trunk. Digging through, he soon extracted a bottle. "It's no Firebeer, because the carbonation wouldn't do very well in space, but I think you'll enjoy it just fine." He was tempted to throw the bottle of rum at her to see if it floated, but realized that if she didn't catch it, that would be quite the waste. Instead, he floated back on over to her and handed her the bottle. "Will this do for a consolation prize?" he questioned.

Pansy watched him float out of his seat, a little surprised that he was moving away from her by choice. She got up and sat in his chair, turning to see what he was digging around for. When he finally pulled out a bottle, she smiled. She took it from him carefully, holding in her hands as if it were the most precious thing in the world. "Ohhhh." She was grinning as if she was a child just given a bag of the most delicious and expensive candy they only got once a year, but of course this was much better than that. Pansy had a soft spot for rum. Firebeer and whiskey and liquor were all good in their own respects, but rum... well, Pansy loved rum the best. Maybe it was the fact that she'd first had some in the Caribbean, maybe it was just that it reminded her of Draco - which could be great or horrible depending on the situation, she supposed - but whatever it was, rum was her absolute favorite. "I could just kiss you for this." She laughed, then gave him a serious look. "I won't, actually, but still. It's that good of a prize."