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Pigfarts [Somewhat Alternative Universe]

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Claire McCann
Dean Thomas
Neville Longbottom
Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy
Scorpius Malfoy
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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 21st 2010, 10:16 pm

He was rather pleased to see the expression on her face. Who knew that a bottle of rum would honestly make her seem so happy? Hell, he should have pulled the bottle out sooner. Unable to help himself, a smirk fell on his face when she claimed she could kiss him, just because of a bottle of alcohol. He didn't let his expression fall when she said that she wouldn't kiss him, because he pretty much had assumed that she wouldn't have in the first place. Still, it was a nice thought that she had even mentioned it. "Well, I'm more than pleased that you're happy with my choice of alcohol and prize," he said, situating himself on the ground where she had previously been sitting. "Go ahead, crack that bottle open," he grinned.

[So, I'm meeting my grandma for dinner...but I should be home no later than 9...I hope. My parents are having a little "party"...but my presence won't really be needed so I will be able to come and sneak some posts if you do respond.]
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Post  Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy August 21st 2010, 10:35 pm

Pansy did as he suggested, popping the cork out of the top and letting it spin off into the room and bounce endlessly off the walls and floor and ceiling. She paused a moment, the blonde hair in front of her not belonging to the last that she'd shared rum with. She shook her head and took a sip, smiling as it was just as good as she'd remembered. "Yep. That's good." She took another swallow and handed it to Scorpius. "Want some?" Generally she wasn't keen on sharing her alcohol, and especially not her rum, but she figured she might as well since he didn't have to give it to her in the first place. She sighed and shoved away the memories that flooded back with the taste of the rum, all the time they'd spent out on the ship in the middle of the Caribbean... but she had to stop thinking about that. It was done with and now she was going to Pigfarts with Scorpius and that was that. And there was rum, which always put her in a better mood. "Tastes better than the jelly beans."


[Alright sounds good, haha. I'll be around all day/night so it's whatever XD]
Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy
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Post  Claire McCann August 22nd 2010, 12:31 am

AND THEN SCORPIUS LOOKED AT PANSY LIKE THIS

Pigfarts [Somewhat Alternative Universe] - Page 3 1q0gpg

BECAUSE OMG THESE PICTURES MAN THEY'RE SO SEXY
AND ONCE PANSY WAS SWOONING HE WENT LIKE THIS

Pigfarts [Somewhat Alternative Universe] - Page 3 Xrrdk

AND AFTER PANSY WAS LIKE REMOVING HER CLOTHES DUE TO SEXY OVERLOAD HE WENT LIKE THIS

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AND THIS

Pigfarts [Somewhat Alternative Universe] - Page 3 V74ept

I CANNOT HANDLE THE SEXY
TIME FOR SEX

love you both.
don't even know what your characters are actually doing, but um.
I was bored.
Claire McCann
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Post  Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 3:18 am

Elise I love you.
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Post  Claire McCann August 22nd 2010, 3:35 am

It was my pleasure.
<3
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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 4:13 am

[Dear Elise...I love you. Those pictures...goodness gracious.]

"Good? You say it like it would have been questionable. Rum usually is pretty damn good. Though, my grandfather would have kicked my arse if he were still alive for liking something so...muggle," he said with a shrug. After taking the bottle from her, Scorpius took a long, slow sip. "Fuck Lucius Malfoy and his views," he found himself saying. He never had liked his grandfather, his connection to the man extremely distant and unloving. "This without a doubt tastes better. Petrol? Acid? Vomit? I'd really like to have a talk with the bloke that had the brilliant idea of making those flavours. He must be seriously messed up in the ol' head," he said while tapping his head with his finger. He passed the bottle carefully over to Pansy, it feeling nearly weightless as he did so. He leaned his back against the bottom of her seat just next to her legs, deep in thought for a moment. "I didn't tell Flint I was leaving. I didn't tell Tam I was leaving. Hell, I only really told Viktor and Sirius, and then left a note for Faye. My mum and dad don't know, my grandmother...I didn't even write her. Does that...does that make me a bad person?" he questioned, glancing up at her.

[OH....AND THIS IS A SPECIAL POST BECAUSE IT IS NUMERO 3000...WOOT WOOTTTT]
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Post  Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 4:21 am

Pansy took the bottle from him and took another sip as he talked about who he hadn't told about leaving. She shrugged and took another sip. "I didn't tell anyone I was leaving. They probably won't miss me anyway. Snape will be the only one to notice I haven't been around, but I'm sure no one would come looking for me." She passed the bottle back over his shoulder to him. "My parents could care less what I do, seeing as they didn't care enough to even be at my wedding. The only real parents I kind of had were the Malfoys, and they don't care anymore either. So if that makes you a bad person, Scorpius, I'm horrible."
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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 5:31 am

"You're not horrible," Scorpius replied with a shrug. "You're human. " He took the bottle from her hands and then took a long swig. A LONG LONG ONEEEE. Long like Scorp's dick. I MEAN LOLWHUT. He passed the bottle back to Pans, then said, "Your parents are lamesauces. Don't worry about them." HE WOULD SAY, "NOW YOU HAVE ME" BUT THAT'D BE REALLY FORWARD SO HE DOESN'T. HE HOLDS BACK LIKE JEFFREY'S DICK FOR ANGELA.
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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 6:03 am

PANSYYYYY FUCKS HIM HARD AGAINST THE CONTROL PANEL AND IT FUCKS WITH THEIR DESTINY. NOT LIKE THEIR LOVE AND DESTINY. EVEN THOUGH THEY WONT LOVE EACH OTHER OR WILL THEY? DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN. OMG. WELL SHE FUCKS HIM SO HARDDDDD AND IT MAKES THEM GO TO VENUS INSTEAD OF MARS CUZ THEY MESSED WITH THE BUTTONS. LOOOOOSEN UP MY BUTTONS BABEEEEE
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Post  Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 6:12 am

*is dead*

Pansy didn't actually do any of that yet, but she took another drink, quite more than she had planned on drinking in that sip. She frowned as it was already halfway empty by now and she handed it back to Scorp over his shoulder. "Yeah. I'm not worried about them. Glad to get away from home for a while now. Guess I'll never have to go back. We could probably stay at Pigfarts forever, you know, if you wanted to." She shrugged and looked down at the back of his head, the blonde hair that was sort of like Draco's but so obviously not. "I guess I could find someone to stay with on Mars if you're going other places afterwards or something." Pansy's mood had improved, as it usually did with alcohol. "I don't how well it would work if we tried to stay together. There could be some really pleasant times, I'm sure." She said the last bit with sarcasm, indicating all the fighting they usually did. Of course, Neville and Scorp are probably both thinking of the actual pleasant times when they do it up against the wall or on the stairs or something like that.
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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 6:24 am

"Well, I could stay forever," he said WITH A SHRUG. Oh oops. Sorry BMK. "I'd only want to visit Viktor really, but that'd be about it. If we tried, we would probably work out just fine. Like cotton candy on a dick. I mean stick. LOL DICK. HARDY HAR HAR. Or, like a lion and his long teeth. That makes no sense but you be understanding my gamin'. BUT YEAH. I COULD TOTALLY GIVE YOU SOME MASSIVELY PLEASANT TIME. Want me to demonstrate?
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Post  Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 6:31 am

"What, you honestly think we could get along?" She slipped down out of the chair and sat on the floor beside him, stealing the rum back and attempting to drink all the rest of it at once. Somehow she managed it but pouted as it was empty and handed the bottle back to him. "Empty. HOW SAD. I WANT MORE. But what're you talking about massively pleasant time?" She blinked up at him, happily tipsy nearing on a little drunk, seeing as she hadn't had anything to drink in such a long time.
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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 6:41 am

Scorp doesn't comment on emptiness and filling that said emptiness because that would just make him comment about filling Pansy's empty hole with his massive dick. SO HE LIKE DOESNT SAY THAT. Instead he replies, "Well, I can tell you about massively pleasant times...but that's just not entertaining. What'd be better is if I just showed you. WANT ME TO SHOW YOU?"
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Post  Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 6:48 am

Pansy laughed. "Maybe you are just not articulate enough to describe such times. So let's go with whatever makes it easier for you to do if you fail at expressing yourself verbally." She blinked at him seriously, still wishing she'd not run out of rum yet. Ashley can't think of anything else to write so this is all you get. I think it's enough. I love Jeffrey and we're gonna do the dirty dirty when we hang out on Friday. Nev hopefully just read that out loud on skype, like she did for all the other posts. That was the only purpose of that sentence, for Nev to say it out loud on skype. Yep.
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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 7:02 am

Scorp stared at her for a moment in slight shock. Was she really sugestting that he go and bone her right now? Cuz...that be what it sounds like. Instead of questioning it, he glanced up at her for a moment. His eyes connected with hers and he immediately felt himself drawn to her sexinessss. SEXY PANSY. WHICH IS LIKE SEXY SADIE THE BEATLES SONG...BUT PANSY INSTEAD. He couldn't help but push himself up towards her, his lips meeting hers in an instant. The booze has clearly set in since Dom's booze is like afkl;sdfjakl;sdj with her mind and her vision slightly. SO. Scorp feels the same as Kendra does. LIKE YEAH.
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Post  Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 7:08 am

Pansy was surprised as he came up and kissed her like that, but she supposed she had sort of asked for it after all. Silly rum, it was messing with her. But her hands found the sides of his head and she pulled him closer to her before letting go quickly, surprising herself with that quick thoughtless action. She knew what kissing Scorp led to, and she wasn't sure if that should be happening or not. How would that even work in a place without gravity? Would it? Would it be terrible? Or awesome? Or what? She opened her eyes and pulled her head back from him, just looking at him. She didn't say anything because she wasn't sure what exactly to say. He was bad with words describing what he wanted to do, she was bad with words responding to what he wanted to do. They were actually rather physical beings, especially in this particular drunken state.
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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 7:18 am

Scorpius was rather surprised when she kissed him back for a moment and pulled him closer to her body. His happiness goes poof when she pulls away slightly. What... in the balls. He looked at her in slight surprise. Did she not want this? Cuz they'd be pretty awesometestical teoghter. completely. SO, he just looks at her all confused for a moment, then pulled her body off the chair...watching as she floated slightly. He pushed his body off of the ground, meeting her in the air where he kissed her and it was magical. and omg. SLUGHRON IS ON MY TV. WHAT A HOTTIE. HERMIHORNNNN
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Post  Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 7:25 am

Kissing while floating in the air was something Pansy hadn't ever done before, and something most people had never done before, because not everyone's parents died and gave them enough money to buy out NASA, right? As he flew toward her, the momentum from his body pushed them up through the open area of the ship, finally ending up against the ceiling. Pansy's hands held onto his jaw again and as they bounced a bit off the ceiling and he started floating downwards away from her. She pushed off the ceiling with her feet to follow him, her body crashing into his as she did.
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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 8:04 am

Scorpius kissed her back and it is so passionate and hot and just freakin awesome. In fact...its even more passionate than passion fruit which is the most passionate fruit. Even mores passionatedc then pineapple. Yeah. It is. Her hand was like fire or ice or something of the extremes on his skin. Whatever it was...it was just so orgasmic. Hahahahah orgasmic looks like organic. ORGANIC PASSION FRUIT IS LIKE ORGASM AND PASSION. Mind. Blown. His hand kind of sort of moves to her back where he pulls that sexy little bootah closer to his his GIGANTIC GROIN. HELLS TO THE YEAH.
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Post  Ginny Weasley August 22nd 2010, 6:04 pm

Holy fucking hell.
I don't...I can't even...
Omg.
I don't remember writing about passion fruit. That kind of scares me.
WELL.
THIS IS JUST REALLY BIZARRE NOW.
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Post  Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 6:11 pm

Hahahahahaha. I was out of it too apparently, because I don't remember making so much of my stuff so.. idk, serious in comparison? And then there's yours going on about passion fruit. It's like, one extreme and the other XD. This makes me laugh a lot.

As Pansy is pulled into him, she wraps her arms around his neck and tangles a hand in his hair at the back of his head. She kisses him even more passionately than passion fruit, which is pretty dang passionate if you think about it. Her tongue traces along his lower lip but enters his mouth without waiting permission, slipping alongside his own. Eventually they float along far enough and end up back on the floor, Pansy hovering just above Scorpius almost parallel to the ground.
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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 6:26 pm

I just want to point out though...that my thinking is kind of logical. Sort of. In some sort of twisted way. Apparently I made a comment about Spongebob living in a pineapple...which would therefore make his cum amazing...WHICH ACTUALLY MAKES SENSE. Oh, and Luna asked if Nev actually read the post aloud with the Jeffangela part. I...didn't remember.


There was something much more different about how they were kissing now compared to the times in the past. There used to be slight hesitation, yet the rum seemed to loosen their thoughts and tongues. He immediately allowed her tongue into his mouth as their bodies come close to the ground once more. It was a bit odd to him, having Pansy on top. Not that there was anything wrong with Pansy...it's just that Scorp was a dominating fellow. Still, he found he liked having Pansy on top of him. He pulled his mouth away from hers, groaning slightly. "What are we doing?" he mumbled, his eyes meeting hers. "Why is it that I can't stay away from you?"
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Post  Pansy Parkinson-Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 6:41 pm

Yes, she did read it out loud and it was grand. You might have actually wandered away from the computer at that time? I don't know.


"Hell if I know." She looked down at him a moment before adding, "But if I'm going to be stuck in space with you, Sir-who-killed-my-marriage, I suppose we may as well at least enjoy the fact that you cannot keep your lips to yourself. I've nothing left to lose by it since we've left Hogwarts behind. Besides, by now I just suspect there must be something genetically twisted about me, what with how I am acquiring these unrequited lovers, though you don't quite fit that description, do you? Maybe that's what I like about you, were I to actually like anything about you. You don't hate me, you don't love me, so you're one of a rare breed, you know." She stared at him interestedly, wondering why it was she couldn't quite figure him out like she could other guys.
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Post  Guest August 22nd 2010, 6:43 pm

Damnit. Pansy beat...no...beet..no....not that one...beat I think...me to it... XD I was going to say yes, I read it out loud but D: Pansy said it first...

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Post  Scorpius Malfoy August 22nd 2010, 7:04 pm

DAMN. I can't believe I missed that. OH TO THE WELL.

"Hmm," he thought for a moment, his hands moving to rest on her back. "Well, I like your way of thinking. There are definitely plenty of things we could be doing right now, like the having sex in midair or doing The Hot, Hot, Hot Seat. See, I've always wanted to try that." He looked at her for a moment then said, "You said that I don't love you, which is true, without a doubt one hundred percent true, but just out of curiosity, what would happen if I did harbour feelings for you? I mean, even say five years from now when we're still riding on Rumbleroar's back, you don't think you could ever love me?" he asked, his hand moving so that his finger gently trailed along her jawline.
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